Innocence
by RelapseAndEscape
Summary: Someone really smart told Finn it wasn't rape, so it can't be raped. Hudmels. Oneshot. Kinn bonding. Response to Glee angst meme.


His brother's hurt.

Breadstix has become ritualistic.

So when Burt's sitting next to Carole and Finn next to Kurt, and they all order the same thing. Kurt's salad's full of pecans and blue cheese, and chicken, and Carole has the same order and Finn's burger gleams in the light. Burt stares at his lean ham sandwich, as they begin to eat. Kurt's eyes are however at his brother. Finn's playing with his fries, and it's not like anyone expects him to not eat. He's pulling apart his food, and doesn't eat a singular item on that plate. Kurt doesn't confront Finn.

The next time they're at Breadstix, his eyes are fixated on Finn as he plays with his meal, pushes around his food as if it's going to suddenly be presented in an appetizing way and takes seldom bites here and there. His eyes are devoid of emotion, and his lips are pink and soft. He looks tired. Carole doesn't say a word, as she discusses something with Burt, and Kurt's eyes are all on Finn.

He swears his brother's lost around at least thirty pounds.

He remembers that he grimaces whenever he sees Rachael and him make out. He remembers Rachael would pull him close, smiles at him and then presses his lips against his own. Finn responds sometimes and other times, he pushes her off and tells her that he's busy when he isn't doing anything. Rachael picks fights with him all the time, and Kurt just sits there, staring at Finn, because he's sure that his shoulder twitches whenever she pulls him close for a kiss.

The next time he sees Rachael walk up to Finn, and then pressing his lips next to his own, Finn pushes himself past and says he's late for class. Rachael just tells him it's afterschool but he doesn't turn back, and leaves her standing there. Mercedes tries to comfort her and Kurt's stomach tells him that Rachael's not the one that needs comforting.

In Glee, Kurt can't wait to get his solos.

Finn can't wait to lose his, because he stumbles even more often, and he doesn't sing so much anymore and just stays in the background, lost and he doesn't say anything about it. His voice's strained and he doesn't sound like he has the energy to sing anymore. McKinley loses many football games because Finn's distracted on the field. He doesn't give a damn when he loses his position as quarterback, and when the class bell rings, Finn sometimes stays back.

The next time it happens, Kurt tells his brother that the bell's rung and Finn looks genuinely confused as he stumbles an "oh…cool," and Kurt realises his brother really has no sense of what's going on around him at all.

Now, he heats up the leftovers, and stares at Finn as he pushes the rice around his plate and take a seldom bite here and there and Kurt sits down beside him, holding his hand. Finn looks at him confusedly as Kurt suddenly speaks. "What's going on, Finn?" his voice's sympathetic and full of concern. "You're not eating. You're not sleeping. You're distracted. You're withdrawn. You're worrying me."

"_Stuff's_ happened," Finn just responds mechanically, eyes suddenly on his fried rice as if it's become more interested and he takes another bite as if to prove to Kurt that he is eating. "I think I might be gay." He suddenly says an afterthought.

"_What_?" Kurt raises an eyebrow.

"…I had like…sex," Finn stumbles, and Kurt stares at him. "With…you know, a dude."

"That doesn't make you gay."

"Oh. Okay." Finn states, and pulls the rest of his plate into the sink, but Kurt's standing in front of him right now.

"Tell me more."

Finn scratches the back of his head, and then nods towards him before sitting down onto the chair again and he looks fine for a moment. "Er…well, we had sex. In…his bedroom. It was a one-off thing but…well, my body did stuff. Like I got hard."

Kurt's eyes are pouring with sympathy. "Does anyone else know?"

"Well…I told Artie about it."

"Artie?" Kurt repeats.

"Yeah, Artie's like _really_ smart—he's on that…that team where they have to answer questions so he knows everything," Finn explains and Kurt just stares at him, with a nod towards his brother, somehow understanding his argument even if half of it doesn't really make sense to him. "I didn't say it…was me. I asked him about it, and he said it was okay."

"What do you mean _okay_?" Kurt repeats and now his chest's hurting.

"Well…I asked him if it was…"

"…if it made you gay?" Kurt suggests but Finn shakes his head.

"You're gonna laugh but…I asked him if it's rape if it's a dude on a dude, but I figured he's right, that it's not really rape…gay men have sex too, and besides, it's not like I'm a girl or anything so—"

"_Finn_," Kurt cuts him off and now there's horror in his eyes. "_Did you want it_?"

"No offense, Kurt but I didn't…really…"

Kurt's starting to look close to tears now so Finn jumps up from his seat and looks at him with sympathetic eyes. "Dude, I'm sorry! Did I like offend you or something…? Because I really didn't mean to—"but Kurt just grabs him to hug him and his arms are tightly around him. "…dude, what are you—?"

"If you didn't want it," Kurt begins, tearful and shaken, "then it's rape, Finn."

"Oh," Finn states at the beginning then it sinks in. "_Oh_…" his voice is sadder and more broken now as Finn feels tears pool into his eyes.

"If…if I cry, is that okay?"

Kurt just sobs harder as he nods. "Gosh, Finn, you don't ask people that question, okay?" Finn just nods his head as tears start to roll down his eyes, and as sobs rack his body. Kurt rocks Finn gently back and forth and just feels how much more thinner he is, and he sees how much more paler he is and he's just wondering how could anyone in the world hurt his baby brother like this because despite Kurt being shorter and tinier, he's at a good four months older than Finn.

"I'm here, Finn."

"Okay.." Finn just says, tears welling up in his eyes again. "Okay."


End file.
